The What-Ifs and Maybe-Nots and Here-I-Am-Now of My Grand Adventure

If you were to tell me at the beginning of this year that May would find me moving to Kentucky for the summer to work at the Creation Museum, I’m not sure how I would have responded.

See, that was a dream of mine for years, but there seemed to be way too many obstacles in the way. Every time I thought about it, I would daydream a bit, pray about it, but ultimately remind myself that it probably wouldn’t happen any time soon.

And that was the case for a couple of years.

Until it wasn’t. At the beginning of this year all the not nows and that won’t work and maybe laters slid into oblivion. It was as if doors were being flung open and other doors were creaking shut and then all at once I was looking down a corridor that was wide open and welcoming me to a grand adventure.

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It was thrilling and exhausting and comfort-zone busting all at the same time. There were multiple times when I thought it wasn’t going to work – like when I applied for the job and didn’t hear back for a couple of weeks, only to discover that they’d replied right away somehow I’d never received the email. There were times when I was so overwhelmed by everything that I had going on that I just laid in bed with my eyes closed. There were times when I pondered all I was giving up and felt a rush of sadness.

Yet, there was never a time when I questioned if it was something I wanted or was supposed to do. Because it took years of praying and working to get me to this place and all the questions and wonderings and weighing the balances happened a long time ago.

And now here I am.

I was supposed to move down Saturday morning, leaving the house at 5:00. Only, Friday night I was awake with the stomach flu and for various reasons, we decided moving with the stomach flu wasn’t the best decision. I spent Saturday resting, and blocking out the thought of maybe it wasn’t going to work to move after all. (Ludicrous, right? I mean, the camper I was going to live in was already in Kentucky, my job was starting in four days, and I was still having to shush worry.)

Then Sunday morning dawned and I left the house a little after 5:00 (to beat the traffic) and headed off on my new adventure.

The Grand Adventure Around the Corner

Sometimes I feel like the most dramatic human on earth. (Actually, that in and of itself was a dramatic statement. I’m not really quite that dramatic.)

See, it feels like a somewhat earth-blowing (that’s a mixture of earth-shattering and mind-blowing, in case you wondered) experience to be moving away from my lovely little home and delightful family, even if it’s only for a few months.

It’s not like I’ve never left home before. I went to Peru for two months once, to Indonesia for a month, and I’ve spent four or five weeks in Mexico various times over the last few years. But this? This is different. It’s me moving off to start a new job, live in a camper by myself, and having a grand adventure without a passel of siblings surrounding me. Plus, there’s also the possibility that I’ll be going to India for three months at the end of my summer away, so that’s kinda big, too. IMG_0108.jpg

It feels rather huge.

I’m excited. Thrilled, really. I’m ready for the adventure, eager to start, and raring to go. Yet, at the same time I sit here each morning the birds serenading me a with a beautiful symphony and wonder why I ever thought it was a good idea to leave.

Today is my last day at the coffee shop. I keep telling myself that I might be back in a few months, but I’m not sure if that’s because that will make it easier for to say good-bye or because I really believe it.

Three and a half days from now I’m off to join my family for vacation and when I get home? Well, then I move homes. And as long as I focus on the delightful thought that my camper will be my home I’m excited. I can’t wait to grocery shop (seriously, the amount of excitement that is causing me is kinda scary), learn the ins-and-outs of camper life, and begin my own routines.

Yet, at the same time I know I’ll miss a lot of special things… My niece being born, haying, VBS, all the loveliness of being surrounded by family, the summer memories that are inevitably made each year, and dancing barefoot in church.

I’m trying to make sure I’m balanced with what I think about – both delighting in the newness that will be my new normal and also thinking through what I will miss so I won’t be blindsided by it.

So, I’m dramatic about moving (I know it sounds like I’m leaving for years instead of months), but I’m fine with the drama, because it’s a grand adventure in life and it’s just around the corner.